Hot Hero Sandwich Project Archives: The Lost Andy Breckman Songbook

by G. Jack Urso

 

A promotional advertisement for Andy Breckman, circa 1979-1980. 

Writer Andy Breckman’s comedy act before Hot Hero Sandwich featured him playing guitar to his own somewhat dark comic compositions, such as one song which featured “a man who is either a mass murderer or just clumsy” — pretty much exactly what someone who wrote for David Letterman and created Monk might come up with. You can check out Andy’s interview with the Hot Hero Sandwich project at Hot Hero Sandwich — Off-Script with Writer Andy Breckman.

Andy turned in some poignant yet still fun songs with “Tommy Two” and “My Friend Bernie.” The songs are layered with meaning and use comedy to camouflage a deeper lesson. Two recently uncovered unaired songs from Hot Hero Sandwich, however, give a glimpse of Andy's slightly darker nightclub humor.

From deep within the Hot Hero Sandwich Project Archives I have discovered some very interesting bits of nearly lost history. Among the finds, including some Andy Breckman promotional materials from his time as a nightclub comic, were also a couple scripts with lyrics to songs he composed, and recorded, but never aired: “The Revenge Song” and “Playing Hard to Get.”

In reviewing the production shooting schedule (see image below) for Tuesday, July 17, 1979, Breckman and the “Breckettes” (the Hot Hero Band) performed and recorded the two aforementioned songs and “Dipstyck,” a song for which I’ve not discovered the lyrics for yet, on the “Disco Set.” 

Production shooting schedule for July 17, 1979.

First up, “The Revenge Song,” filmed on Studio-8H, Tu., July 17, 1979. was slated for Episode 1, but got cut due to time constraints. This shows a bit harder edge than the bittersweet underpinnings of “Tommy Two” and “My Friend Bernie.” A young man, tormented by a childhood bully, works out and studies the martial arts for years. Grown up, he tracks his bully down and . . . promptly gets beat up — again.

“The Revenge Song” lyrics page from an original Hot Hero Sandwich episode 1 script.

The Revenge Song

Chorus:

Let’s sing about peace on Earth.

No, no, no, I want to sing about revenge.

Let’s sing about love, love, love.

No, no. I’d rather sing about revenge.

 

When I was in fifth grade, many years ago

Billy MacGown stole my radio

He made fun of my mother, he broke my bike.

He was the meanest kid I ever knew.

Every afternoon at three o’clock he’d be waiting for me

Out in the parking lot

He used to throw me down on the ground and kick me in the stomach

Real hard till I turned black and blue.

 

Chorus:

Let’s sing about the birds and the bees.

No, no, no, I want to sing about revenge.

Let’s sing about the flowers and the trees.

No, no. I am talking ‘bout revenge.

 

For ten long years I studied kung fu.

I practice karate and jujitsu too.

For ten long years I worked out every day

Till I was stronger than I was ever before.

I jogged and swam and I lifted the weight.

I had to register my hands with New York State.

And when I felt I was ready I took a bus back home

And I knocked on Billy’s door.

 

Chorus:

Let’s sing about the Woodstock nation.

No, no, man. I’m singing ‘bout revenge.

Let’s sing about the good vibration.

Will you shut-up! Can’t you see I’m talking ‘bout revenge.

 

I said, “Hey man, remember me?

I was a little kid then but as you can see

I ain’t no more. Now get on out here.

You’re gonna get what’s coming to you.”

He threw me down on the ground and began to kick me real hard.

I said, “Oh, no, not again.”

He probably would have killed me if they hadn’t pulled him off.

It still hurts me right here every time I take a breath.

 

Chorus:

Let’s sing about peace on Earth.

Peace on Earth? Sounds good to me.

Let’s sing about love, love, love.

I don’t want to hear no more about revenge.

I still can’t touch my toes.

 

Do you want to see my scar?

Love, love, love, love, love, love.

 

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The next song, “Playing Hard to Get” may not translate too well from the late ‘70s zeitgeist which gave it birth. There is a certain stalker vibe to it, though at 15 in 1979 I would have just thought it a funny song about some guy who couldn’t take a hint. Its intention, in context of the script, was to point out the immature aspects of such behavior. “Playing Hard to Get” was also filmed Tu., July 17, 1979. 

The “Playing Hard to Get” lyrics from the script.

Playing Hard to Get

by Andy Breckman

 

There used to be a girl named Linda living down the street.

She used to scream and run away whenever we would meet.

Everytime I’d telephone she’d hang right up – and yet

I think she really liked me, but was playing hard to get.

 

Sometimes I used to follow her as she’d come down the block.

She used to say if you don’t quit I’m gonna call a cop.

How them handcuffs pinched my wrist I never will forget.

She was crazy for my lovin’, just playing hard to get.

 

One time she beat me up so bad

My leg was in a sling.

I hobbled around for half a year,

Love’s a many splendored thing!

 

I understand she’s married now and living in L.A.

She’s got two kids already with another on the way

She’s never called or written me but still I do suspect

She’s crazy for my loving, just playing hard to get.

 

All the girls adore me, they’re just playing hard to get. 

 

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Duck and Cover and DIE!: Rehearsing for the Nuclear Holocaust

by G. Jack Urso

 

From the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

Produced in 1952 by Archer Productions for the Federal Civil Defense Administration and in consultation with the Safety Commission of the National Education Association, Duck and Cover is a 9-minute animated film aimed at school-age children to teach them practical life-saving tips on how to survive a nuclear blast. While Duck and Cover was generally regarded as the height of Cold War paranoia it has in recent years received a more favorable treatment with supporters pointing out that the techniques taught by “Duck and Cover” actually can improve survivability depending on the distance from the blast epicenter.

They’re out of their tiny little minds.

Widely shown throughout public and private schools in America during the 1950s and 1960s, Duck and Cover drills, along with other Civil Defense measures, created a paranoia and mistrust of government that contributed to the creation of the counter-cultural movements of the era — exactly opposite of what the film hoped to accomplish.

As a late Baby Boomer born in 1964, I’m just old enough to remember the Duck and Cover drills at St. Teresa’s elementary school on New Scotland Avenue in Albany, NY, which took place as late as 1971 and 1972. I remember looking out the windows and imagining the horrific blast as the nun instructed us how to crawl under the desks to protect ourselves. Another drill had us shuffle out into the hallway to crouch low against the inside walls. We were all of 7 and 8 years old.

Just an average day of rehearsing for the holocaust in Post-War American schools.

Another feature of the post-war Duck and Cover generation were the civil defense loudspeakers which, usually in the summer, would be tested by blaring a loud warning. Mounted on wooden telephone or green metal utility poles, these loudspeakers were scattered throughout the city. There were a couple in Pine Hills where I grew up, one at the nearby Little League ball parks on Woodlawn Avenue, and another about a half-mile away near the corner of Mercer Street and Ryckman Avenue. Much to my surprise, both were still around when I graduated college and moved back into the area in 1990. Still there about 2000, they were removed not long afterwards. Ghostly relics of a near-apocalyptic past, they served no purpose after the Soviet Union broke apart.

A next-door neighbor was a Civil Defense warden and his home had a cache of CD supplies, including the lemon and cherry-flavored high-caloric candies meant as a dietary and energy supplement. My complete collection of Popular Mechanics and Popular Science magazines from the 1940s to the 1980s (an inheritance from by Uncle Frank) are filled with plans for bomb shelters, mainly during the 1950s and 1960s issues. My grandfather, a WWII Italian army veteran, built a bomb-shelter as a sub-cellar off the basement. My dad tried to ease my nuclear anxiety by pointing out if a bomb dropped near us, it would probably be in Schenectady, where the General Electric facilities were, about 30 miles away, not in Albany itself.

Oddly, it gave me little comfort.

Picture Parade, 1953.

While an entire generation grew up under the threat of nuclear annihilation at any time, our popular entertainment become more and more — well, just plain weird and outrageous. TV series such as Batman, The Addams Family, The Munsters, Laugh-In, Mad Magazine, and many comic books, movies, and music, reflected our anxiety over an imminent holocaust and rightfully questioned the credibility of the world order that brought us to this point. We consumed more, we partied more, we used more drugs, we had more sex, we found religion, and we lost religion. Of course there were consequences, such as having to endure the fundraising moralistic preaching about our behavior from the older generation who gave us a world where death is always around the corner.

As an adult, I ended up as a weapon systems profiler for a military database in Washington DC for 25 years. It actually was a result of an interest in tracking weapon sales I developed while a member of Amnesty International. What I learned is that the dirty little secret about the doctrine of Mutually-Assured Destruction (MAD), which promised peace because both sides knew that launching any nuclear weapon would result in an immediate full-response — literally destroying the world — is that it worked. We came close several times but survived the Cold War. Would Russia have invaded Ukraine had it kept the nuclear weapons it gave up in the early 1990s?  It’s a question for which I’m not sure I really want the answer.

Duck and Cover theatrical release poster.

Perhaps MAD worked when there were just three nations with nuclear weapons, but now there are at least eight nations with nuclear weapons, possibly nine. If a nuclear weapon were to be used now, it likely would not result in a global thermonuclear war, but a very localized event such as at Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

Nevertheless, I'm not inclined to consider that progress.

The complete Duck and Cover film is available above from the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

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Hot Hero Sandwich Project Archives: Official Series Credits Press Release

by G. Jack Urso

 

Dated Oct. 22, 1979, two days after the initial start date of Oct. 20 (later moved to Nov. 10), this production memorandum represents the final official credits list. In a variety-type show like Hot Hero Sandwich, with both filmed and tape segments and last-minute celebrity and music scheduling, keeping track of the cast and crew is imperative, particularly for awards consideration and probably a few unions as well. The original release is provided below at the end of this article.

The release identifies the directors of the film sequences:

GaiI Frank (wife of series writer Joseph Bailey)

• Captain Hero opening
• “Ebony Eyes”
• “I Love My Shirt”
• In & Out segments
• KISS rock documentary
• “When I’m 64”

Al Waller

• “I’m OnIy Sleeping”
• “Tee Shirts”

I was especially excited to find this document because it also identified the artists of the animated  sequences working under the aegis of Jerry Lieberman Studios.

Animator: Mary Beams

• Episode 2 Animation Segment: “Flying to Bermuda”
• Episode 8 Animation Segment: “School in the Sky”

 Animator: Bruce Cayard

• Episode 3 Animation Segment: A Girl Dreams about Her Cat
• Episode 7 Chuck Berry: “School Day (Ring Ring Goes the Bell)”

 Animators: Mary Beams and Bruce Cayard

• Episode 10: Dreams Interview and Animation Segment (“Space”)

 Animator: Al Jarnow

• Episode 6 Animation Segment: Martha Reeves and the Vandellas, “Wild Night”

Animator: Jerry Lieberman

• Episode 8 Animation Segment: Dave Dudley, “Rollin’ Rig” (“Stork Deliveries”)

Animator: Eli Noyes

• Episode 5 Animation Segment: A Young Girl Dreams of Stage Fame
• Episode 10 Animation Segment: A Boy Dreams He's From Another Country

The original release is provided below (click on image for larger size).

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Hot Hero Sandwich Project Archives: Tentative Series Production Schedule

by G. Jack Urso

 

Dated May 15, 1979, this production memorandum issues by producer Howard Malley lays out the series projects shooting schedule. The filming schedule identifies the location shoots and the studio taping exactly that — videotaping in Studio 8-H.

The original memorandum is provided below (click on image for larger size). 

 

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Hot Hero Sandwich Project Archives: The First Official Press Release

by G. Jack Urso

 

In the course of my research, from several sources, including the invaluable support and archives donated from series writer Marianne Meyer, I have accrued a large number of original documents on hard copy. What better way to inaugurate this new category in the Hot Hero Sandwich Project than with the first official press release from the show’s production team (see images at end of article).

Dated June 7, 1979, producers Bruce and Carole Hart encapsulate the shows mission:

Carole Hart said: “There will be a variety of themes, including: physical changes common to adolescence; the emotional and psychological hang-ups common at that time of life; the new awareness of sex; relationships with the family; new friendships; secret terrors; coping at school; out-of-school activities.”

“We’ll note that this age group feels uniquely isolated, helpless, misunderstood. Our sub text will be:  ‘Look, you’re not crazy – you’re normal, this is just the way things are.’ Our aim is to encourage viewers to think while they are being entertained. But always we’ll have a light touch, with the accent on humor and music.”

Bruce Hart said: “The situations we will touch upon are universal – everybody has faced them. But today, they seem more difficult for youngsters because of the times in which we Iive.  The celebrities on our show will talk exclusively about some of their experiences in growing up and how they survived their teen years.”

In the release, Dr. Tom Cottle is only identified as a “permanent interviewer,” and the main cast’s age range is given from 16-19 — stretching the truth juuuuuuussssst a bit. Vicky Dawson was the youngest at 17, and then L. Michael Craig (Michael Longfield) at 19. The rest of the main cast clocked in over 19 with Paul O’Keefe the oldest at 28.

Interestingly, a series premiere date of Oct. 20, 1979, is given. Later NBC promotional materials advertised a planned start date of Nov. 17; however, the show actually debuted Nov. 10. While start date changes are not uncommon, for Hot Hero Sandwich being a Saturday morning children’s show, the November start dates were, frankly, deadly. The Saturday morning fall TV schedule typically kicked off mid to late September, so an Oct. 20 start date, while a little late, was still fairly early in the season. By November, however, viewing patterns are already established, and a 12 Noon start time didn’t help either.

The original press release is provided below (click on image for larger size).

      

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Year 1999 A.D. (1967)

by G. Jack Urso

 

Life will be richer, easier, healthier, as space-age dreams come true.

—     Quote from Year 1999 A.D.

From the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

 

Produced by The Tom Thomas Organization for the Philco-Ford Corporation for Philco’s 75th anniversary in 1967, Year 1999 A.D. takes a look forward into what life will be like 32 years in the future. Both technological and social changes are explored and the predictions hit pretty close to the mark with home computers, email, the internet, large flat-screen TVs, and more. The video is available above from the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

Philco had something of a history looking forward, as with its ground-breaking Predicta television sets produced from 1958 to 1960 (see image on right). The design, however, proved to be a little too advanced for its time and reliability issues were raised. Philco went bankrupt in 1961, shortly after which it was acquired by Ford.

Aeolus 13 Umbra often takes a look at the commercial and industrial films of the past for insights on how society viewed itself. By looking at the future, we also reveal more about who we are right now.

Performances

The family car, the Seattle-ite XXI, is a 3/8th-scale model Ford concept car
displayed at the Century 21 Exposition in Seattle in 1962.

The story revolves around the Shaws, a family of three. The father, Mike, is played by veteran game show host Wink Martindale, looking not unlike a young Robert Culp. It’s a bit odd to see Wink in a straight roll, and not the center of action, but he surprisingly does a good job and makes one wonder why we didn’t see him in more of these kind of roles.

Mike is married to Karen, portrayed by Marj Dusay (billed as Marge Dusay). Dusay had a long career in Hollywood with nearly 100 credits, including the infamous Star Trek episode “Spock’s Brain.” 

Kerry MacLane is the young son, Jamie. MacLane had a 10-year acting career, from 1966-1976, and appeared on many of the top-rated shows of the era, including Adam-12, Family Affair, Bonanza, The Brady Bunch, The Waltons, and Kung Fu.

The narrator is Alexander Scourby. Scourby’s distinctive, deep voice is immediately recognizable to Baby Boomers having narrated numerous National Geographic Specials as well as dozens of other productions in addition to his acting career.

The director, Lee Madden, is perhaps best known for the biker film, Hell's Angels '69. Much of his career was spent producing and directing commercials and industrial films, like Year 1999. A.D., through his company, Lee Madden Associates.

Sharp-eyed sci-fi fans will notice something familiar about the beach at the beginning of the film — it is the same location as the last scene in Planet of the Apes where Charlton Heston’s character, Taylor, discovers the ruins of the Statue of Liberty. It is the far eastern end of Westward Beach, between Zuma Beach and Point Dume, in Malibu, California.

The far eastern end of Westward Beach in Year 1999 A.D.

The same beach in a shot from Planet of the Apes.

Predictions

The family created for this peak into the future is comprised of the father Mike, an astrophysicist who only works several days a week and has an interest in botany. In his study, he has a workbench with a wide screen which stores images for analysis. Rather than individual computers built into various devices, one central computer is envisioned, like a mainframe computer of the time. The powerful portable and desktop versions we’re familiar with today were seldom envisioned in the sci-fi of time.

The Year 1999 A.D. home computer is one large appliance that serves the entire home.

Karen is at first described as a “part-time housewife.” Later on, we learn she was a Fine Arts teacher but now occupies her spare time creating artistic works in pottery. While not stated directly, the inference here is that Karen left her career to be a housewife, despite, as the documentary claims, the home not needing the same amount of work as in the past due to automation. Rather than liberating the wife to work outside the home, her work remains in the home, reflecting the gender expectations at the time. 

Their son, Jamie, only goes to school two days a week and is homeschooled via computer the rest of the time. Not much is learned about Jamie, and he seems to spend most of his time alone interacting with the technology in the home — an ironic coincidence that also reflects the modern-day experience.

Their home is a Mid-Century Modern design, definitely built for the upper middle-class, and powered by a “self-contained fuel cell” (like the ones used by the space program). The home is described as hexagonal in shape, with modules that can be added as the family's needs grow. 

Jamie’s at-home schoolroom has a large, wall-sized flat-screen TV, quite similar to what we have today, as well as several other separate learning machines, rather than one integrated desktop unit we might use today. What struck me about this segment is how alone Jamie was in all of it. He wasn’t interacting with another teacher or other students via a video connection. The human component was completely removed. It was reminiscent of many students’ experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Large, wall-sized, flat screen TVs are common in the future predicted in 1967.

Karen uses the home computer to create meals and calculate calories, calls up the food from storage, and heats it in the microwave oven, all on Philco-branded appliances, of course. Karen can also do her shopping using the computer connected to various stores who advertise their wares via video link. Mike pays the bills online via a direct connection with a bank computer and uses “an electronic correspondence machine, or home post office, which allows for instant communication.” Today, we call that email. Of course, there are also video calls, which have since become quite common.

Gender rolls haven’t changed much in the future predicted in 1967.

 

The wife plans the meals, and the husband pays the bills.

The fuel cell generates power, controls the home environment, produces pure water as a by-product, and burns waste, providing off-grid self-sufficiency. 

A home health center has not just the latest exercise equipment, but also a diagnostic bed which records your weight and vital statistics. Music synthesizers and computer games provide entertainment and there is the classic Swinging Sixties cocktail party (fully integrated in the future with Asian, Black, and White party goers) watching a performance by a Latin singer on a wall-sized TV with 3D projection.

Predilections

The future portrayed in Year 1999 A.D. is decidedly an affluent one in which leisure time is central to the lifestyle. For a company that sold appliances and automobiles, their predictions are almost predictable with a predilection for the positive. They are foretelling a future that their products make easier. Nevertheless, despite the self-serving nature of the program, the predictions are pretty spot-on with many of the anticipated technologies in the film available by 1999 or shortly afterwards.

1967's look at 1999 is probably no less fantastic than what 1935's predictions about life in 1967 might be like — 32 years in its future (see Scoops clipping below). So, what will life be like in 2056, 32 years from now? Given the state of the world, I'm not so sure I want to find out, but the world of 1967 also had its share of woes including racial and political strife, social upheaval, war, and the threat of nuclear annihilation, yet Year 1999 A.D. manages to look forward, not just technologically, but socially as well.

Scoops magazine UK (1934/1935).

Remember that integrated cocktail party at the end of the film? Interracial marriage was illegal in 15 American states until a Supreme Court decision in 1967, the year of this film. Legal segregation only ended in 1964 when the Civil Rights Act became law. So, that simple integrated cocktail party at the end of the film is not just window dressing, it represents a hope for, and a vision of, the future . . . and does so with a knowing “Wink” at the audience. 

What’s next? You never know. You never really know.

—     Wink Martindale in Year 1999 A.D. 

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Aeolus 13 Umbra has previously turned its attention to retro films that predict the future, including:

• The Futurists: CBS News — McGraw Hill Educational Film (1967)

• The Westinghouse Total Electric Home (1960)

1999 swings like crazy, man, in 1967.

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The Westinghouse Total Electric Home (1960)

by G. Jack Urso

From the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

I’m Betty Furness. In all my years at Westinghouse, I’ve covered some pretty interesting stories, but here is truly the most wonderful and exciting thing I’ve ever had the chance to talk about. It’s the Westinghouse Total Electric Home. A home where electricity does everything, heats, cools, illuminates, launders, preserves and prepares foods, and entertains. It even lights a path to the front door.

— Opening Narration

The Westinghouse Total Electric Home opened its doors on April 24, 1960. Representing the height of a Mid-Century Modernist approach to design, the home had all the electrical conveniences of the day, and more, from a video doorbell to a microfilm recipe library in the kitchen. In 1960, Westinghouse produced a short promotional film of the All Electric Home, available above from the Aeolus 13 Umbra YouTube channel.

According to the Washington State Department of Archaeology and Historic Preservation, the home is the result of the joint G.E. and Westinghouse Live Better Electrically (LBE) campaign launched in March 1956 to promote the sales of electric appliances and housewares. In the big post-war construction boom, this was smart way to attract both contractors, home buyers, and the media. The program was enhanced by a series of medallions that could be displayed on homes that met certain levels of LBE criteria. Several types of medallions were awarded over the duration of the program:

• Medallion Home – Live Better Electrically
• Gold Medallion Home – Live Better Electrically
• Total Electric Award – Gold Medallion Home – Live Better Electrically
• Light for Living – Gold Medallion Home 

The Westinghouse All Electric Home in the video is meant to be a showplace for all the associated technology developed by Westinghouse for this project. Floor plans went for $10 ($105.26 as of 2024). It likely would have been cost-prohibited for most homeowners to afford all the options, and I suspect some may never have quite made it to full production (like the microfilm recipe library). Nevertheless, not all the options were needed to meet the LBE criteria and the Washington State Department of Archaeology and Historic Preservation reports the campaign was a success with some estimates ranging with over one million LBE Medallion homes being constructed. Particularly in the Northwest United States where electric power was relatively inexpensive at the time, this proved to be a boon to the construction industry.

The home environment control station.

In addition to the video doorbell and microfilm recipe library, other features include:

• A home environment control station
• An electric starter living room open grill/fireplace
• Home entertainment center
• Electric exercise equipment
• Electrically operated walls to provide open play and study areas

Period advertisement with future president Ronald Regan.

Advertisements, commercials, and industrial films, while biased towards the producer, provide an insight into the economy and aspirations of the era. Aeolus 13 Umbra has previously turned its attention to a number of these types of films in past, including:

• Ephemeral Films (1931-1960): A Look Back on an America That Was
• Mego 1970s Action Figure and Games Toy Commercials
• Retro TV Commercials: A Resource for Historical Study
• The Futurists: CBS News — McGraw Hill Educational Film (1967)

The LBE campaign reportedly lasted until the early 1970s and Seattle-area real estate continued to advertise LBE medallion homes as a sales point through 1983, according to the Washington State Department of Archaeology and Historic Preservation. More affordable analogs of the technology featured in the video are within the reach of homeowners today, proving that these futuristic, if slightly impractical, model homes of the past proved prophetic in predicting consumer trends.

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