Saturday, April 25, 2020

Abbott and Costello Discuss the World Health Organization

by G. Jack Urso

Abbott: Ok Lou, today we’re going to talk about the World Health

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Exactly.

Costello: What?

Abbott: No, WHO.

Costello: That’s what I said! Who are we talking about?

Abbott: Precisely.

Costello: Look, Bud, I’m confused . . .

Abbott: I’ll say.

Costello: What are we talking about?

Abbott: Not what, WHO. We’re talking about WHO.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: That’s right.


Abbott: Oh, I see your problem. WHO is an abbreviation for the
               World Health Organization. A wonderful group that does
               important work.

Costello: OK, well then, what about WHO?

Abbott: Well, WHO has come under fire recently for its purported
               close ties to China under its current leader Xi Jinping.

Costello: Xi Jingaling?

Abbott: No ding-a-ling, Xi Jinping. Show some respect why don’t

               you? Now, follow along with me . . .

Costello: That train has already left the station.

Abbott: [slaps Costello] Hey, don’t be a wise guy!

Costello: WATCH IT! So, who started all this trouble?

Abbott: No. It was probably Hu.

Costello: WHO?

Abbott: That’s right,

Costello: How can I be right? I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I’M
                TALKING ABOUT!

Abbott: Listen Lou, it’s really quite simple. People think WHO has
               too close ties to China, led by Xi Jinping, but those ties
               were first established under the previous Chinese leader
               Hu Jintao as an effort to get WHO’s help to deal with their
               periodic epidemics.

Costello: Periodic enemas?

Abbott: Well, that won’t help with respiratory diseases, but it's
               probably better than injecting disinfectant.

Costello: What idiot would suggest that?

Abbott: Oh, I don’t know. Some stooge I suppose.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: [slaps Costello] Don’t insult Hu like that!

Costello: HEY!

Abbott: Sorry Lou, you just get on my nerves sometimes.

Costello: So, let me get this straight. You’re saying who is
                 responsible for close ties to who?

Abbott: Boy, you said it.

Costello: And who was replaced by Xi Jingaling?

Abbott: Hey! [raising his hand] You want a fresh one?

[knocking on the door]

Costello: I wonder who's at the door?

Abbott: No, its not Hu. It’s probably the landlord coming to collect

               our back rent.

Costello: You mean . . . Fred Trump?

Abbott: That’s who.

Costello: Boy, at this point I really wouldn’t be surprised at all. 


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